Splitting Movies

Hello!!! Everyone πŸ™, today we are gonna talk about the thing which every single one of you likes whether you are male or female, teenager or adult, black or white, no matter which language you speak, no matter which religion you follow you always wanted to that things all day πŸ˜‰.

No, no, no,

I am not talking about getting high πŸ˜“.

I am talking about watching a movie πŸ‘Œ.

Yup, every one of us like watching a movie.And if I personally tell you my experience than I say I love watching movies.After a hectic stressful day, I just go home, change my clothes just wear underwear and watch the movie sitting on my couch with fast food in my hands.

By the way, don’t image that image of me in underwear I am a little shy person 😳.

So if we talk about the movies there are many genres of the movie which are romantic, comedy, adult comedy, fantasy, historical period movie, action, romantic comedy, science fiction.In short, everything you do in your life, it has a genre in movies.

So that day is not very far away when we have a movie genre named toilet.But what type of film is gonna made under that genre?

Shit, shit, shit, πŸ’©

Why I have scenes of that genre of movie in my mind 😫.Now I have to restart my brain.But first I have to delete that images from my brain.

Delete…

Delete…

Deleting…….

Restarting brain in 3,2,1……..

So where are we πŸ˜“?

Yup,

But I know some of the readers wanted to see a film like that and I can tell you by the naughty smile on your face 😼.

So if I talk about myself I watch every genre of movie and love them except that toilet genre.

Why has that word has been stuck in my mind after deleting it?😫

Why? God, why?

And after watching and wasting thousands of hours of my life in every genre of the movie no matter of cast, creed, religion.

Ohhh sorry πŸ™‡, in this line we are not talking about peoples but we are talking about movies.But what do I do? we talk about peoples so much and whenever I write “no matter” my mind itself attaches it to cast, creed, religion, automatically.

So yup, after watching every genre of movie.I made some points.Which according to me is the main flaws or sins of the movies.

After reading above line it gives a little Impression that I am some kind of scientist and after doing scientific research in my lab for years.I discovered something new and unique 😎.

But if you are also a movie fan than you can think of me as a scientist because every movie fan has the ability to believe lies.

Please don’t get offended πŸ™.

And if you get offended.

What drawdown can you cause me? 😼

*Viewers reduced thought came in mind*

Ohhh I am extremely sorry for my that offended comment πŸ™‡.

Please don’t hit unfollow button, please πŸ™.

So let’s end this drama and come to real business.

So I am saying I am like a scientist.

Hmmm, that’s feel-good being a scientist 😎.

Okay sorry, I am not gonna do any more drama in future.Believe me 😏.

But why I am talking only about idler of movies because I know in my whole life I cannot gonna make a movie.So why not let’s cleave the clothes of good movies.And it is also easy to point out someone mistake than appreciating them.Just like you peoples who always point out my mistakes in the comment section πŸ˜’.

Again please don’t get offended πŸ™.

And if you get offended.

What draw….

No, I am not gonna say any furtherπŸ™Š.

Disclaimer:

I am not a movie critic.I am just expressing my views.So please don’t go out of your way to or hate on anyone.

What the hell I am talking about πŸ˜“?

No one is here hate someone if I tell them to do so.And if you really listen to my words than go beat the hell out of that filmmakers 😠who make this kind of shit πŸ’© that I am gonna talk about .

So, now let’s talk about these diseases.

I mean drawbacks of these movies.

I know what you are thinking .You are thinking I am just making it an exaggeration but I think today that’s the topic we are talking about.According to me, the movie is itself an exaggeration πŸ˜‰.So today everything Is okay if I say I have a time machine then you have to believe me because today we talking about the movies and in movies anything happens 😎.And it is said that movies are inspired by real life.So we can say that I really have a time machine.

So,

“After proving my point that I really have a time machine.I can say that I don’t know that whether I am a scientist or not as we talked about earlier but what I definitely know is that I am a lawyer” 😎.

So these diseases are:-

But first, tell me who tell you about your diseases?

Doctors.Right?

And right now I am telling you about diseases.

So now I became a doctor 😎.

So these diseases are :-

  • The depth of characters as deep as a coin.

The depth of characters in the maximum movie is very deep.”As deep as a coin but you people are thinking coin does not have any depth”.

Exactly, that’s what I am talking about.Maximum movies now days do not have depth in characters 😬.
For eg no, I am not gonna mention any movie name otherwise I have to fight a sue case in court.But I can fight a case because I am a lawyer 😎.Right? As we talked earlier.But I don’t want a fight.What you’re thinking? I am coward to fight a case or I know if I fight a case I lose 😨.No, I am not coward nor I afraid of losing I am just not in the mood to go to jail. So let’s end this point here 😜.

  • Gold looking actor.

In every movie, if we see the actors who act always have a stone like a physique, they look sexy, they have chiseled jawline, in short, they look like they have been polished by gold.Sometimes there glitter is so strong that I fear that I cannot get blind if I watch them with my naked eyes 😡.

Again use of exaggeration but today is okay because we are talking about…..

Correct πŸ˜‰.

Some readers after reading this point of my.They will be thinking that I am also an actor who is ugly and has been rejected in thousands of audition.That’s why I am criticising good-looking actors. No, I am criticising them because I am jealous of them 😈.

So at first, I am a scientist, then a lawyer,then doctor and now an actor.That means I am a very multi-talented man.

  • Kiss in the gutter:

No matter which type genre of movie your watching.True love always happens between hero and heroine πŸ’“ but why heroine always loves the hero😬.In real life no one loves me .No, I am not saying I am a hero.But I can say I am also a hero because we talked earlier that I am also an actor 😎.

But the most irritating scene is that kissing scene which happens anywhere at anytime.

What am I saying? that’s scene for which I watch even boring films 😼.

*Thinking in the mind.*

*Why am I sharing this thought with you?.I have to act like a critic.Not like a movie lover.*

Okay, so where are we? Yup, I am talking about kissing scene.They added unwanted kissing scenes anywhereπŸ’.For example, if there is nuclear explosion is gonna be happening in 5 seconds ohh 5 seconds is a lot of time.In that so much time
Hero-heroine even goes on a honeymoon πŸ‘«.

So let’s reduce the time of the nuclear explosion.Now let’s assume that the nuclear explosion is gonna happens in .1 seconds.In that .1 second, they are gonna kiss each other πŸ’.And if this happens in real life kiss is far away thing I cannot even a properly spit 😫 if I know the nuclear explosion in gonna happening.

  • Always partiality with villain:

When every movie begin the villain of that movie is rich powerful and has lots of girlfriends 😎.But as movie progress that super dude villain converted into beggar at speed of light, I say faster than the speed of light.

(Scientific joke)

  • Change of state of one character.

Scientific definition:-

A change from one state (solid or liquid or gas) to another without a change in chemical composition is known as a change of state .

I know you fall asleep 😴.

But please wake up.

Exactly like that in every movie, there is one character who always change its side.”Sometimes from hero to villain so sometime villain to hero”.

And if we look carefully than matter always changes when we change it’s condition like when ice is put in a room temperature than it converts into the water and when water is heated it convert into gas.

Again wake up 😴.

Just like that this character always changes its side when that side started losing 😱.

And just like I mentioned earlier I have watched so many movies that I developed an instinct that I know from the beginning who is that mutiny 😎.

So after putting so many scientific knowledge in front of you.You people have to believe me, that I am a scientist 😎.

  • The result of movies are twins.

Just like two twins look same with slight changes every movie has the same result in which villain has to sustain partiality of the filmmaker😑.Sometimes I feel so pity for the villain that I think of becoming a hero and lose one time just for the sake of villain community so they can also feel good sometimes 😈.

If any filmmaker is reading this article please select me in the movie, pleaseπŸ™.I am even ready to loose to villain.

*Thinking in the mind.*

*Calm down, Rohan calm down.*

*Behave like a critic.*

  • North pole to south pole reality.

If there is gonna be a unit for measuring reality in the movie.”Than if reality is in north pole than in movie they show reality in the south pole”😀.Some filmmakers even don’t know the word reality.The only thing they know in the name of reality is Kim Kardashian 😼.

They always show at the end of the movie that hero and heroine are living happily together with lots of money and lots of kids not, exactly equal to money amount but anyways with lots of kids.Because in the movie everything they show has as much as reality as today’s reality show.

These are the things which I dislike about every movie.I just wanted that these things should be edited out from the movies.Because we have seen so much of these things in the movie.

Don’t worry I didn’t add any humour in the above line.This time I am serious because I really wanted that these points should not come in movies more often.

Yup, I am saying like that I am president of a country 😠.And after reading these article filmmakers gonna try to make a movie according to my wishes.

But first, let’s see the progress of me in this article 😎.

First I become a scientist than lawyer than doctor than actor and now president.I really made progress 😎.Right?

I am not saying that all films which are made have these points.I am just saying that maximum movies have these points.But I am not gonna say that I do not feel entrained by watching these movies.I love πŸ’“ this type of movies no matter of genre.

I have to say the above line otherwise I am gonna get lots abuses in the comment section πŸ˜‰.

So now, sit on the couch and watch the movie as I watch them 😈.

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33 thoughts on “Splitting Movies

  1. Squashy Moss says:

    I really like films where the characters have lots of depth. They have flaws and are human but with emotions. I like most types of films but I prefer a good romance, comedy or action film. You made me chuckle a few times. You get a Sunshine Blog nomination. You don’t have to do the questions I want you know I like your blog very much.

    Liked by 2 people

  2. michaelbencik says:

    Wowser! That’s one hell of a post, with lots of emoticons and images to go with your point! I’m all for watching tons of movies, relaxes me. There’s not a genre that I hate. I like old movies though I tend to find they are slow, and some new movies are too poppy no content. Worst movie I have seen is xmas with coopers or something like that!

    Liked by 2 people

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